curses

" its my birthday today." she said.
fuck. its mom's birthday today and she had to call to remind me.
silently stabbing myself in the heart over and over again with a ragged, rusty knife called guilt, i apologized profusely and hung up the phone.
what is the matter with me? i've changed into such a heartless bitch.

speaking of...

" bitcchh." he swore ever so passionately.
you talk about her with such fury. sometimes it makes me wonder, perhaps you havent fully gotten closure from her.
taller prettier . better in basically every godfrickin way
if he still has unresolved anger(issues) over his old flame, he's probably still beating himself up over the fact that the relationship's become a 'what was once'. it should mean something, shouldnt it?

" slut." the other one swore, a solid two hours later.
the room smelled fresh of cigarette smoke. i was silent.
" she's not a slut. just not who you thought she was." i tried to console him. but the words slipped off like jello sliding on linoleum floor.
"slut." he spat out once more. " how could she do this to me? she's acting as if nothing happened."
" i'm sure your previous girls have done bad things as well. things that you dont know of. people do shit. she's only done one mistake -just one. you cant judge her by that."
he got up. "i need beer or something..."

mistakes. we only bring it out on ourselves..